Wednesday, December 28, 2005

When I Was 26, It Was a Very Good Year

This guy with the tambourine is how excited I get when I compile 'Best Of' lists

King Koopa’s Best of 2005 List:

Best First Date: November 10 at BW3, with the figuratively bowlegged "Elle". Keep your, “yeah, because it was Koopa’s ONLY first date for the year” comments to yourself, thank you very much. As I kicked her ass in NTN Trivia and told her all the reasons she shouldn’t get involved with a shady character like me, this is the song that would’ve been playing if we were characters in a movie: Acid House King’s “Tonight is Forever”.

Best previously-unreleased Bob Dylan song from the year’s best soundtrack: Just Like Tom Thumb’s Blues (alternate take #5), from the soundtrack to Dylan’s Scorsese-directed documentary “No Direction Home”. Sorry, “Visions of Johanna (Take #8)”, maybe next year. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, if I was forced to choose one musician’s catalog to listen to for the rest of my life it would be Dylan. Dylan’s my favorite American and the embodiment of what made this country great.

Best remix featuring beats derived from a GameBoy: Beck’s “Girl” (8-Bit Remix). People say Beck’s lost his sense of humor, but by releasing a four song Gameboy-beat remix album before the official album release, I’d say he’s at least retained a sense of playfulness. I guess Scientology still allows playfulness. Stay tuned to Koopa’s Hideaway for any change on Scientology’s rules regarding playfulness.

Best cover song by someone with English as their second language: PJ Pooterhoots, covering Hall & Oates, “I Can’t Go For That”. (PJ Pooterhoots also won this year's award for Best Solo Artist Name.) This song has always been a floor-filler, never more so than with Ms. Pooterhoots’ version. It’s irresistible. If you can hate on this track then you are hopeless and I feel sorry for your miserable soul. The singer sounds vaguely Asian, but I can’t really place the accent. She sounds pretty sexy though, in that Yoko Ono pre-Beatles-breakup sort of way.

Best song that I can’t understand a single word of: Dungen’s “Festival”. Technically, I purchased this Swedish import in mid-2004, but it wasn’t released in the US until this year. It just means I’m cooler than you, that’s all, and I shouldn't be penalized for my excessive coolness. Dude, you know I was into Swedish prog-rock like WAAAAY before you were. This album kicks Swedishmeatballass.

Best song about outer space: Edan feat. Mr. Lif, “Making Planets”. A swirling, psychedelic trip from the year’s most original hip hop album. This song makes me think of taking a midnight cruise on a summer night with a full-moon, nodding my head like a demented bobblehead, with cheesy grin plastered across my face.

Best album to tide me over until the next Flaming Lips album: The Earlies' "These Were". Sorry, Brian Wilson, SMILE just didn't do it for me as much as "These Were". Again, technically, I purchased this album in 2004, but it didn't get released in the US until 2005. Don't hate me because you wish you had my refined musical palette. Instead, enjoy this slice of Tex-Brit psychedelia: "Morning Wonder", by The Earlies.

Best song from the year’s best album: The album is My Morning Jacket's "Z" and the song is “Off the Record”. Yeah, I’ve got this song on 7” vinyl. That’s right. I know, it’s pretty awesome, huh. I’m like a cumulonimbus cloud of coolness and I’m raining all over you. Hope you brought an umbrella because the forecast is calling for continued coolness with a potential for extreme awesomeness.

Best record label to put out a totally crappy hip hop record: Quannum. And, the album is APSCI’s “Thanks For Asking”. I’m a Quannum ball-swinger, but this thing just didn’t cut it. It’s the first chink in Quannum’s armor. Don’t make me start swingin from Stones Throw’s balls, guys. Seriously. This album's sooo crappy, I won't subject you to any mp3s.

Best remix of a song featured in a Will Smith movie: Amerie, “One Thing” (Siik remix). Pure hotness. On so many levels. The remix isn’t as jittery as the original, it makes Amerie’s vocals the focus of the mix. Ah shibbies!

Best show I saw all year: Wilco in Kalamazoo. Jeff Tweedy just keeps getting better. He’s proved himself to be one of the best songwriters of his generation. This show rocked me six ways from Sunday. “Handshake Drugs” from Wilco’s new ‘Kicking Television’ live double album was one of my favorite songs from that show. The best part of the weekend was when I forgot to bring my ID and I wasn't able to drink at Bell's brewery. Tragicomical. In a typical Koopa-type way.

Best reminder that Michael Jackson used to be more than just a plastic-faced pederast: Team 9’s three way mashup of MJ’s “Scream”, Beck’s “E-Pro”, and AC/DC’s “TNT”. Me thinks he didn't write this song in that "dreaming tree" of his from the embarassing TV documentary he did.

Best new love song that sounds like a really, really old love song: The Band of Bees, “I Love You”. Break out the satin sheets and uncork a perfectly aged bottle of love tonight, hideawayheads. Pop this song in the boombox and get ready for romance, the likes of which you've never dreamed.

Best solo album by a member of Sea and Cake: Sam Prekop's "Who's Your New Professor". I'd say this is definitely one of the 5 best albums of the year. And, since this is my blog I'm going to go ahead and say that. While I'm saying things about Sam Prekop, I'd also like to say that the lead-off track, "Something" is my favorite song. There. I said it.

Best radio hit that never got played on the radio: Josh Rouse, “It’s the Nighttime”. This album got completely slept on. I really enjoyed it. You should too. Rouse may be a poor man’s Jeff Tweedy, but he’s well on his way to Tweedy-level consistency.

Best vacation of the year: My missions trip to Hungary. That ended up being my only vacation of the year, but it was worth every Forint. Here’s some totally sweet 70’s Hungarian garage rock: Skorpio Group, “The King With Shred Legs”. Don’t let the song title fool you, it’s all in Hungarian. And in case you had any intentions of learning Hungarian, be aware that the world’s top linguists still can’t decide what other languages Hungarian is related to. It's not Latin or Slavic-based. Their best guess is that it’s a descendant of some of the Scandinavian languages. Hungarian uses accents, weird letters and everything. Good luck.

Thanks to all the people who have checked out the site since I started this thing up last February. If it weren’t for all eight of my ravenous, insatiable fans, I wouldn’t be doing this. Thanks for stopping by and stay classy, Hideawayheads. King Koopa loves ya.

2 comments:

My Daily Struggles said...

I'm King of Bavaria. Greetings.

BK/CK said...

For some reason, I don't believe you are the all-powerful leader of Bavaria, Gary Freedman. I can't quite put my finger on why, but...I just don't.

But, greetings nonetheless.